I would Rather My Kid Have Autism Than Die from Measels

As a mother of a child who died from adverse reactions to a plethora of vaccines, I have come across all sorts of comments on social media regarding autism-related injury to vaccines. This is the one that has me most concerned. This statement comes from a place of fear presented to us by the CDC, engrained in our brains and once in mine asking the question, why on Earth would people choose not to protect their children from disease? “Surely, the CDC was implemented to find cures and vaccines to protect us from disease and death”.

In 1942, the CDC was created initially to help limit the spread of malaria during war-time. Our soldiers were fighting on foreign lands and contracting mosquito-born strains of malaria until it consequently was deemed eradicated in 1951 within the USA. (cdc.gov, 2018).

Statistics from 2015, show that the CDC, which is currently a for-profit entity was gifted by its taxpayers $6.6 Billion dollars to continue it’s “life-saving” research. In 1983, pharmaceutical companies offered large monetary gifts (ie.monies) to the CDC, which the government allowed. “In fiscal year 2014, the CDC Foundation raised $52 million, $12 million of that from Big Pharma” (circleofdocs.com, 2018). This symbiotic relationship opened a doorway to the new onslaught of vaccines which forever mutated the vaccine schedule. Along with the law 42 U.S. Code § 300aa–22 – Standards of Responsibility Act passed in 1986. This was also known as The National Childhood Vaccine Injury Act of 1986. Shortly after, a government-mandated court system known as The Vaccine Injury Compensation Program (VICP) was established to hear those cases of vaccine-related injury and death.

Re-read the last paragraph. The CDC is a government-run division funded by your tax dollars and grandfathered in to receive limitless funding from pharmaceutical companies. I once worked for an allergy clinic as a transcriptionist and I remember on most Fridays there was always free food in the lunchroom. I look back on those days and now understand the bribery that went hand-in-hand with the samples of medications provided by the drug companies.

So, back to the reasoning behind the title of this blog. When I was a child I received single-shot doses of measles, mumps, and rubella, DTP, and the Polio Shot. At the same time, autism rates were 1 in 2000 children. Currently, children receive 72 doses of vaccines which contain adjuvants to preserve shelf-life and rapidly stimulate the immune system response and current autism rates are 1 in 59 children.(cdc.gov, 2018). I have heard the argument that maybe physicians are better adept to classify autism then they were back then. Well, that argument can’t be upheld since autism has been coined since 1908. We have to look at what’s happening in our environment and it is something that most everyone is experiencing. Is it so incredulous to believe that a schedule created by a government entity, influenced by pharmaceutical companies, and ultimately adhered to by all pediatric physicians might cause adverse reactions, neurological degradation, and death just to name a few “side effects.”

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Image Retrieved from:https://www.thehealthyhomeeconomist.com/cdc-adds-3-more-vax-to-childhood-immunization-schedule/

 

Take a look at the menu you are signing your child up for and ask yourself if you’re okay with injecting these toxins into your children. My son had 9 doses at his very last “wellness” visit, which ultimately took his life. I took care of my son when he banged his head on the floor screaming for hours, I embraced his need to thrash constantly because he had a sensory-processing disorder and couldn’t be in a crowded store, I held him when he kicked me and slapped me, I drove him to bi-weekly speech therapy, prepared him with Early-Intervention pre-K, tried every day to potty train him when he was 4, and ultimately had to bury him when he fell asleep and never woke up again.

I embraced my son under any condition as long as he was still alive, but vaccines caused this to begin with. The problem is…I didn’t know it until he was gone. I believed in following the schedule, I believed in vaccinating my child to prevent disease, I believed in my son’s pediatrician.

So for those who tell parents who don’t vaccinate their children you hope their children die from measels and that you would rather vaccinate and have autistic children, I wonder how would you feel about not having your child at all.

Do your own research, check out my resources, open your eyes, remove the rose-colored glasses, and come to the understanding that we are being lied to.

Resources:

About CDC 24-7. (2018, January 19). Retrieved July 06, 2018, from https://www.cdc.gov/about/history/index.html
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). (2018, April 26). Retrieved July 06, 2018, from https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/autism/data.html
Is the CDC Sleeping With Drug Companies? You Decide… (2015, June 15). Retrieved July 6, 2018, from https://circleofdocs.com/is-the-cdc-is-sleeping-with-drug-companies-you-decide/

Helplessness Starts With a 4-Letter Word

“Mutual helplessness is the essential relation between parent and child.”
― Marty Rubin

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Helpless is the only word I can think of to describe it. I have been converted back to a small child wailing, grasping at air, clawing for things I can’t comprehend…helpless. Four years I had the task of caring for my son and apparently, I am the only one who observed but didn’t really comprehend until now.

If a man took my son and shot him nine times on a busy city street would anyone stop to help him? I wonder with so many witnesses would an attorney lay claim in court to prove that my son had been murdered. Of course, there are teams of justice in-place for such things to remove criminals from our city streets and they are imprisoned for their crimes. Killers remove lives and the damage touches the souls of everyone that loved the one departed. Those teams of justice are supposed to give voice to those whose voices can no longer be heard.

I have spoken to 20 attorneys and no one will bear witness to the horrible crime that happened to my son. They ask for a smoking gun, a confession that reads: I injected this boy with 9 vaccines, which resulted in his death. Even the killer in the street wouldn’t confess his crime of guilty, why would a physician?

Helplessness is when the pharmaceutical companies receive complaints that their drugs are causing adverse reactions and death and the government says, hey here’s a get out of jail free card. We will make it so nobody can hold you accountable and these people can file a claim in an established governmentally-funded vaccine court. We might as well open a burger joint outside a cattle farm with an invitation that reads, welcome all vegans: all you can eat.

I had a dream, many dreams for my only child Johnathan. I never thought I would place his name on a stone next to mine before my demise. I wake up every day fighting tears from the helplessness of a reality I don’t want to exist in.  I’m not looking for money; I am looking for justice for a little boy whose voice was taken from him at a pediatrician’s office.

You can call me crazy, one of those crazy anti-vax people who plan on bringing down modern medicine with “fake-news” and pseudo-science. You can call me whatever the fuck you want, I just don’t care anymore. Take one look at your child and say to yourself, can I imagine the rest of my life without them in it? No, you can’t imagine, because that feeling of helplessness will never take hold unless that happens to you…I hope it never happens to you. I’ll tell you what I do believe in, accuracy and thorough scientific studies that prove 100% without a doubt that adjuvants within vaccines are truly safe and effective. I want to see a vaccine court that no longer exists because people no longer suffer injury and death, VAERS eradicated, children, living long lives free of autism and neurological deficits. Anything less than that isn’t acceptable in my eyes and I struggle to understand how this is crazy.

Ask questions, expand your beliefs, research, and most importantly; reach your own conclusions. The truth is, the world is a helpless place to live in and the crimes against humanity are very real.

 

Johnathan’s Journey

Johnathan’s Journey

Click to Read: Johnathan’s Journey
Johnny

Today, one year ago today, the world lost the most amazing little boy named Johnathan or as he aptly called himself, Sunshine.

A medical examination was conducted as to what took my sweet son’s life, but the cause was left as undetermined with no medical explanation. Well, I am the type of person who refused to accept a non-answer as an explanation for anything, especially when it came to the loss of my only son.

I have spent every moment since researching, speaking with others, and reading medical journals to find answers. This is Johnathan’s story and the hope I hold is that you learn from my loss to prevent your own. We all need to know what’s really being injected into our children through vaccines and also understand that the amount given at one time is unconscionable.

These are my findings, harrowing experiences as a grieving mother, and my advice regarding a topic that’s been considered taboo for way too long. Open your eyes to the knowledge that is right in front of you and save the future for our children.

 

Happy 5th Birthday In Heaven

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Today, I was supposed to light 5 candles on your chocolate cake. You would look at me with a face full of frosting as your family and friends sang of another year older. That celebration of your life will never be made and instead, I light the candles of remembrance of a life taken away too soon.

The toys and the presents will remain unopened and the joyful cries of my son will never be heard. We will remember your laughter as a joyful memory that made everyone smile and recall the days of their own youth.

Why has the world chosen to move forward when the seconds of my life pass slowly without you by my side? I long for the moments of not having a minute to myself, of replacing batteries in your tank engines, making sure bubbles were added to your bath, and chocolate was added to your milk. I miss those moments when you would snuggle with me and tell me you love me. I would give my life to just see you run around the house breaking shit for just one day more.

Now the only thing that is left broken is my heart and without you, it will remain that way.

Happy Birthday to my son in Heaven. Mama loves you.

Will You Listen?

When a mother loses her only son, will you turn away from me and run?

Will the reality of how it happened make you uneasy?

I was promised he would be safe if I just listened to how things needed to be.

Did you stop to listen when we asked if 9 vaccines were safe, did you care to see?

He has allergies they confessed, dark circles are the reality of this.

You cannot say he died from this because a month did progress.

He had the strength of 15 men, he was fierce and strong, and relentless.

 

How did his strength and joy diminish, was it his time to relinquish?

How does a boy regress so quickly when all he did was love completely?

So tell me now that the shots you gave him, did not end a life so shortly antiquated.

I try and make sense of the story you gave me, that every child fits so perfectly into a mold of a schedule not tested, you took his life, you took our future.

Nobody is held accountable and I am left alone in this life so insurmountable.

You could have done them one at a time, instead, you killed him in his prime.

I’ll never see my son grow up, you took my love and life from me.

So stop and think next time they say that every child is built the same way.

 

 

 

What to Expect When You’re Expecting AND Vaccines

Protect yourself and your growing baby, avoid vaccinations during pregnancy.

Pregnancy DiabetesI remember when I became pregnant I read “What to Expect When You’re Expecting.” This book had many useful tips on the changes your body will go through, cravings, week-by-week growth, and one page on vaccinations. Of course, this book took the approach that vaccines for a pregnant woman and her growing baby are safe and effective. It does say that live viruses are not good for a pregnant woman, but that the Tdap, flu, and Hep-B are perfectly safe. The same goes for the Center for Disease Control (CDC) which states “The CDC wants you to know that vaccines are an important part of a healthy pregnancy. Certain diseases can be very serious for you and your developing baby during your pregnancy. Getting vaccines during your pregnancy can help protect you both and provide your newborn with some early disease protection.”(https://www.cdc.gov/vaccines/pregnancy/downloads/what-to-expect.pdf)

A recent study was featured on The Today Show headed by Dr. James Donahue an epidemiologist at the Marshfield Clinic in Wisconsin. Note this study was also funded by the CDC. It studied pregnant women who received the flu shot in combination with the H1N1 vaccine over the 2010-12 flu season. Results showed that 485 women had spontaneous miscarriages 1-28 days following that combination. “The overall aOR in the 28-day window was 2.0, or double the risk, but those findings, in contrast to the H1N1 subset, were not statistically significant. There was no association seen in any other exposure window.” They have decided to continue vaccinating pregnant women even after the evidence was profound that these vaccines caused “Double The Risk” of miscarriage and stillbirth. The CDC has decided to disregard the findings of this study and continue to administer the flu shot to pregnant women. The study is ongoing, however, it’s initial findings are evident, yet the CDC vaccinates.

My question to the CDC is why are you not holding off on killing children so that you can do further research on the connection between vaccines and pregnant women? Any other medication goes through strenuous testing and research trials, but vaccines have never been tested in combination with each other, nor has the entire vaccine schedule been tested as a whole. Why do scientists, health officials, and drug companies spend so much more on research regarding Viagara than it does on testing vaccines that are injected into pregnant women and children?

2017-10-23_0516In September 2012 Dr. Gary Goldman released a study in the Human and Environmental Toxicology Journal (HET) “Reporting a 4,250 percent increase in the number of miscarriages and stillbirths reported to Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System (VAERS) in the 2009/2010 flu season. For those not familiar with VAERS, this is a database setup for physicians and patients to report vaccine-related death and injuries. However, this data has to be skewed because only 10% of vaccine-related injury and fatalities are reported to VAERS, so the number should be higher.

If the CDC will not hold-off on vaccinating pregnant women until they complete their research, then we are all truly test subjects awaiting their results. We have not voluntarily signed up for this research and women should be appalled they are used in this manner. My advice to pregnant women is not to get vaccinated during pregnancy until the CDC can complete their studies and research and provide a definitive outcome. Don’t let your unborn baby be a statistic. If you want to improve your pregnancy, do so with diet, exercise, and avoidance of environmental toxins. Don’t let anyone else determine what is safe and effective for your baby when they haven’t even completed the research to be able to make that statement.

Resources:

Goldman, G. (2013). Comparison of VAERS fetal-loss reports during three consecutive influenza seasons: Was there a synergistic fetal toxicity associated with the two-vaccine 2009/2010 season? Human & Experimental Toxicology32(5), 464–475. http://doi.org/10.1177/0960327112455067

 

 

 

 

 

 

I’ll Save You

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I’ve been having very vibrant dreams lately. They are filled with worry and they have one unifying theme…I am trying to save Johnathan.

I would always tell Johnathan that nothing bad could happen to him because mama would never let it. I would become this strong and fearless supermom if harm ever came his way. When people laughed at his helmet, I stared them down. When the first pediatric neurosurgeon wanted to cut his skull from ear-to-ear, I got a second opinion. When people stopped and stared when his behavior wasn’t “normal” I would hold him in my arms and tell him over and over how much I love him.

I never thought that doing the right thing could harm my son. I had always believed in the power of modern medicine and the benefits of vaccinations. Johnathan had every shot the CDC schedule recommended. I was listening to his doctors and adhering to the belief that they knew what was best for him.

On January 16, 2017, Johnathan went to his 4-year “wellness” visit where he received 9 vaccines at one time. On February 25, 2017, Johnathan suffered a Grand mal seizure and never woke up. After his shots, he was getting sick all the time at school. He continued to have fevers, clammy skin, and dark circles under his eyes. His behavior worsened and his progress he had made was rapidly regressing.

I can’t forgive myself for allowing the vaccines to take my son’s life. I will have to live every day with the knowledge that I gave permission for a doctor to poison my son’s immune system and brain. Some of you may experience that same guilt and as you know it tears you up every day. I see his face in a photograph and I want to scream at the top of my lungs that I had a choice. I hear his soft voice in a video and I want to tear my heart out because I thought I was doing the right thing.

Some people will tell you that it wasn’t your fault and that the doctor should have advised me of possible side effects. I now know that every aspect of your child’s health should be researched and scrutinized. Why didn’t I know this before?

For some of you reading this, you may have children who will be visiting their pediatrician for one of those “wellness” visits. I won’t tell you what to do or what not to do, but I urge you to do your own research. If you visit the resource page on this blog you will see many articles, videos, and testimonies regarding vaccinations and their harm to our children.

I can’t save my son, but my hope is that you’ll save yours.

Resources